Do you ever catch yourself glazing over someone else's life and wondering how they manage to figure everything out? How that dress fitted her so perfectly or how everyone now has Air-pod so you must get one to "feel" fit in? Will, let's talk a little bit about ego.
So what is ego?
Let's put it in an easier explanation. You can think of the ego as a false image of ourselves that we must be to be happy.
We all want something that we don't have and why is that?
1) Wanting the Acceptance from others: We all once putting a different mask for others. That could be trying to behave differently so we can feel blend in or hold on someone else expectation so we can feel fit in. But why are we doing this to ourselves when actually, we doing this for others?
Here is how the ego playing in our head
Ego: I need this dress
Our mind: Why?
Ego: Because everyone else are wearing it.
Our mind: Will I fit in?
2) Crave for a short happiness: Do you catch yourself saying " I may not have a nice body as her but when I do, till then I can be happy" or "I may not have a supportive partner right now because I am too busy with work and school but when I do, till then I can be happy". Do you ever get what you ask for but for some reason that short happiness and excitement don't seem to last for so long? Will that's because your ego telling you that you must have a certain thing in your life so you can live up to your delusional of your happiness.
The examples of how ego placing in our life:
If I have beautiful skin then I'll be happy.
If I lose 20 lb then I'll be happy.
If I am rich then I'll be happy.
3) Insecurity: We all have insecurity, our make-up hides our insecurity and our words hide our confidant.
Example of Insecurity:
"I am not pretty enough to ask him/her out"
"I am not brave enough to speak in public"
"I am not smart enough to share my idea"
"Too many people overvalue what they are no and undervalue what they are" - Malcolm S. Forbes
How to tell the different between Ego and Self-Development?
The best way to limit our ego is to self develop ourselves. Know what your goal is and use the right reason to guild you.
"I want to post this picture so I can get many likes vs I want to post this picture because its beautiful"
"I want to go to college because that's what most people do after High school vs I want to go to college because I want to be educated for my future career."
I hope you made the guess that the green underline are your Self- Development and the black underline are your ego.
What if you lose 20 lb, earn extra money, and Instagram famous, now what? You won't be fully happy because you are feeding yourself the thought of false happiness. We will always be seeking for something more and endless list that we thought will bring us happiness. You can't truly be happy if you can't embrace yourself where you currently are.
"Ego is always trying to come up with ways to please itself but never is satisfied"
You have the right to be happy. You deserve everything you want to make yourself truly happy and you need to let go of ego to get it.